I just want to apologise to all of Scotland, for a few years back, I did indeed fire Robert Burns. It was during my time in the food industry, Mr Burns was to get a stocklist doon from upstairs. I could see him on the monitor downstairs as I cashed up tills, a very industrious young man going from the chiller/freezer to the lift (elevator) filling it up with boxes, I happened to notice his mouth was in action, his cheeks were bulged out like a chipmunk and my supervisor senses were tingling. He was nearly done so it was a good time to confront him.
I put the cash in the safe and went upstairs where I found Mr Burns with sugar from the frozen donuts all around his face, he knew the game was up and went quietly, a silly thing to get fired for but its called zero tolerance. He hasn't written much in recent years, I hope it didn't scar him emotionally.
I found a whole stack of half eaten donuts doon the back of the freezer during stock take. I suspect Mr Burns was the tip of the Ice burg, I bet it was those fucking Bronte sisters, bitches.
This is a true account of what happened, the names have not been changed to protect the guilty, as then it wouldn't have made it to become a post. Have you ever fucked over a person with a famous name ? if so the Blog world wants to know.
I put the cash in the safe and went upstairs where I found Mr Burns with sugar from the frozen donuts all around his face, he knew the game was up and went quietly, a silly thing to get fired for but its called zero tolerance. He hasn't written much in recent years, I hope it didn't scar him emotionally.
I found a whole stack of half eaten donuts doon the back of the freezer during stock take. I suspect Mr Burns was the tip of the Ice burg, I bet it was those fucking Bronte sisters, bitches.
This is a true account of what happened, the names have not been changed to protect the guilty, as then it wouldn't have made it to become a post. Have you ever fucked over a person with a famous name ? if so the Blog world wants to know.
5 comments:
Dunno about fucked over, but I fucked Jimmy Sommerville from Bronski Beat/Communards in 1989.
I also charged a bacon sandwich and cup of coffee to David Dickenson's tab last month - I'm sure I've got a few more stories as well - give me a minute.
I love how the addition of doughnuts makes every story delightful.
Stay strong, Knudsen.
I was just reading Burns poetry last night, AND a brief biography of the Bronte sisters (I'm not kidding), so this is a timely post.
I almost had a boy friend named Richard Burton, but he got away.
mr frobisher jimmy Sommerville? who hasn't?
sassy sundry being a hypocrite I may have tried the frozen donuts as when I did it its called quality testing, they were still edible and quite nice.
robyn Blogjinx! I didn't mention in the story to avoid racial stereotyping but my Robert Burns was Irish, I also had a best friend called Steve Martin.
Stoop away Rich, you're a blogger now, think off the posts.
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