Friday 24 August 2007

Better Dead Than Red

What a busy few days I've have, I don't just sit around blogging and surfing for porn all day you know, well not all day. I've been jet setting around the world. First I went over to the Caribbean for a brief holiday. I can't really say much about it except the world is a safer place.

I put an ad in the classifieds of the New Yorker, "For sale: The only good commie is a dead commie, slighty soiled $ 500." I think my boss will be well pleased.

Expect a bit of this for a while.

I was able to catch the second half of the Brazilian weemen's football team who were playing Cuba Unitied. I'm a big fan of these gurls they are never afraid to tackle the balls.


They always insist that I help them shower, you know me I never want to offend by saying no incase its a cultural thing. Brazil has the highest murder rate in the world it also has weemen with big bubble butts, I love that cuntry.


Then I flew up over to L.A. and boy are my arms tired, sorry an old aeroplane joke there. I took my L.A. fuck buddy Jennifer out on the town there was a bit of a scene with an insanely jealous Eddie Waring but after I promised him a slow dance at the end of the night he calmed doon.



Then I went up to the state of Washington because I've always wanted to see the Whitehoose and what they have done with it since I set fire to the place in 1812 and that big statue of Lincoln but it seems they moved all of that, I didn't even get to see Mount Rushmore. I did see my good old friend First Nations, shes been gaging to get me in her bed for a long time read this account of my stay with her .

After a lovely stay with First Nations I sneaked across the border into Canada, its not like its guarded or anything I mean who the fuck would want to sneak into to Canada? A couple of Arabs in a van asked me if the American side was well patrolled and which way to the Smithsonian , I told them I wasn't a fucking tour guide but its just off the Hershey highway and up Pennsylvania ave on the right you can't miss it. You always have to say "you can't miss it" its tradition.

I called at MJ's hoose but no one answered so as usual if its someone I know I'll break in but then I saw her a little busy in the picture above teaching a fellow blogger some HTML moves.


Ah fuck it I got the next plane home just in time to answer the phone from my parole officer.

10 comments:

Old Knudsen said...

Americans and their lack of geography.

The Mistress said...

I saw you peering through the window but the hell if I was going to let you in.

Do you know how hard it is to get spunk out of chenille?

NiolK said...

I prefer the sound of the word "snuck". I know that "sneaked" is correct and that "snuck" is a fairly new bastardization but I just prefer the way it sounds. Like hung and hanged.

The letter K is not an evil letter it is just misunderstood. I like dirty pillows. Sssshhhhow me your dirty pillows.

Old Knudsen said...

MJ thats very rude, shame on you, maybe I should get my own key.

nokia I've snucked a lot in my time. My dirty pillows are in the wash.

The Mistress said...

You'd best return that key to the locksmith and get a refund.

It's too big for my keyhole.

Old Knudsen said...

0'er missus.

Maven said...

Love that bit with Weekend at Fidel's! Oh shit, I wish I had Photoshop!!!

Old Knudsen said...

I wish I had the weemens brazilian football team.

Eyebee said...

I thought Eddie Waring was dead? It was a knockout wasn't it? Or was an up and under that did it?

Old Knudsen said...

Don't grandstand on my blog with a question of sport.