Saturday 8 March 2008

If yer Blog Has Blood In It Then Its Time To Delete

I don't have too much to say on this blog today except this. Don't let Gollum use yer bog. He just moved in next door with his gurlfriend Shirley but wants to keep his turds to himself as he likes to mold them into different shapes and paint them. The bloke is an artist and sells them doon at the market. He says hes got a bit of a creative block right now but you wouldn't think it if you looked at the toilet after he'd been, it looks like something Jackson Pollock would do, more like creative pebble-dashing.

We got into a big argument the other day when he accused me of stealing one of his turds, it seems him and Shirley get into it all the time. The lad isn't all there if you ask me. He cums up to me and says, " Its Gollum's ring, no ring for Old Knudsen" I say um ok then right you are, don't ask don't tell I mean queers can do what ever they want as long as I don't have to watch and I don't get splashed that's what I think. Not really fair on Shirley with him on the doon-low shes looking after his 12 babies and thinks that dressing up is putting on a t-shirt with only one or two stains on it.

Oops I can hear violent splashing coming from the bathroom, it doesn't look like he'll be making any figurines or turd jewelry today. I do wish he'd learn how to do a courtesy flush.




7 comments:

The Mistress said...

At least he had the decency to crack open the window.

PENDULUM said...

A novel idea no doubt. I'm all for the turd way. Anyway, I can't help notice- Golum does look like a chip off the auld block. Quite a resemblance.

h said...

That was a tad strange. I wrote about Ireland today. Perhaps you'd be good enough to peruse it for inaccuracies.

Anonymous said...

I'm laughing my ass off. You make me laugh. good job

Jenny said...

Are you and Troll... you know...

"good friends"??

Just wondering.

Old Knudsen said...

I love the smell of golloum in the morning.

The Mistress said...

Alert the media.

Eddie Waring is back.

wv: KYzii
that's so ghey