Thursday 8 January 2009

A Sticky Crime Scene

I was passing by a local IHOP, thats 'International Hoose Of Pancakes' though I believe they do other foods I don't know its a little too fancy and upscale for Old Knudsen.

I saw a police crime scene truck. They are usually driven by weemen police as weemen do crime scenes better than men because its boring work that needs attention to detail, nothing to shoot.
Nearby I saw a black and white, thats what we playas in da hood call pig mobiles or panda cars.

I'm not one for stereotype as you know but I did chuckle that they weren't at a donut shop. I had just chased off a black fella with me walking stick in case he was going to mug or rape me because I'm white when I saw another 2 cop cars pull into the car park (parking lot for Yank mongs) it was then I wish I had friends for I was cracking myself up with jokes about their big case ...... of waffles! or the prices were just so criminal or their work was really stacking up! fuck I'm am one funny person.

There was a total of 5 pigs er sorry I mean no disrespect to the cunts of law unenforcement but really they are so useless and harass poor innocent folk like me instead of other criminals.

Then I saw an ambulance pull up, here it would be paramedics or some such nonsense so I laughed even more.

I can imagine the big black police chief shouting about his best officers may need cardiac resuscitation and sent them up there.

I found out in the paper that the police in our town just seized 1500 lbs in marijuana sent up from our southern state of Mexico. No wonder they were in IHOP they all had the munchies.

This story is totally based on true events as you can't make this shit up, well you could but why bother when you can just observe it and report on it?

If you don't find cops in IHOP funny then what about Congress voting for their annual pay increase? called the cost of living increase, the thing that no one else gets. Well it would be dumb to vote against a pay increase during a depression so well done democracy or is it a republic? maybe its the goverment mocing the public a mocpublic.



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11 comments:

Daisy said...

good one...we had a situation here where the cops would all meet at IHOP at a certain time of night and have their "dinner" or whatever...got to be such a joke in the town and people would come just to see them gather that they stopped coming...i thought that was priceless!

The Mistress said...

Where's the "international" in 'International Hoose Of Pancakes'?

I don't see any listings for them across The Pond.

M@ said...

Also heard Laura Bush just spent half a million on new china for the White House. Er, Black House.

Anonymous said...

Eh? IHOP? What are you talking about? Pancake policy? Don't need no farting pancake ...

MarlaSinger said...

please forward all "cost of living" pay increases to me.

as I am most deserving.
god forbid they might have to lay off the cleaning lady, the pool boy, and maybe take only 2 vacations to remote destinations.

oh god bless america and all that garbage.

MarlaSinger said...

oh and i hate iphoop.

terrible. terrible "food" if thats what its being called.

h said...

The Rooty-Tooty-Fresh-N-Fruity breakfast is top-drawer. Yes, they have full lunch-and-dinner menus but 64% of their sales are breakfast items like pancakes.

They have a new strategy to boost their lunch and dinner business which includes a boxed-lunch program.

Anonymous said...

So after all they sell junk. Junk food in a box that turns to junk immedeately when the happy customer has scraped the shit out of the corners.
Readymade throwaway art.

Bunny said...

Hey, at least the cops are moving up from Dunkin' Donuts.

You are quite correct that we do not have a true democracy in the U.S. It is a representative democracy, which is sort of democracy-lite. A federal republic.

Political philosophy question of the day: Which group wanted a federal government, the Federalists or the Anti-Federalists?

Bunny said...

MJ: They serve different kinds of crepes with other countries' names: Swedish crepes, French crepes, etc.; I think that's how they justify the "International"

The Mistress said...

Bunny: And they probably serve it with Canadian back bacon, eh?