Monday 23 July 2012

The Joker Isn't Very Funny


A personality profile of the Colorado Joker James Holmes has come to light by former professional profiler Old Knudsen.

Holmes aged 24 has always been seen as a shy and reserved kind of person. In other words a socially awkward penguin/joker. A loner who didn't like to make eye contact or exchange normal courtesies  ........ probably Schizophrenic living in a world in which he is the cool nemesis to the Dark Knight.

One problem there. Its DC and can never be cool, its camp as fuck with umbrellas that shoot poison gas for fucks sake. The only powers anyone has is the power to look totally ghey.

The facts:

Holmes is a chronic masturbater  and is heavily into porn, his mother Arlene and father Robert were always catching him with his lil joker out. Addicted to Vicodin and guitar hero ........ what a pussy and loved Techno music....... why he just didn't shoot himself is beyond me.

Having a degree in neuroscience meant he ended up working with the best of the best in McDonalds he was also offered a place at his second choice Taco Bell but Mickey D's was his dream job.

After being fired for having sex with the special sauce he began studying for his PhD at the University of Colorado School of Medicine in Denver but dropped out a month ago as his studies were interfering with his online PRGs.......... priorities. 

Wow what a total loser. 

Still sticking to the schizophrenia assumption he probably had his psychotic break in private at college and away from any loved ones who might have noticed.   

Holmes who was a student without a job got armed to the teeth with weapons bought at a Pro bass  outdoor shop, he had a Remington 870 Marine Magnum pump action shotgun a Colt AR-15 Tactical Carbine and .40 caliber glock handgun, an extra glock in his car. He walked into a movie theater at a midnight showing of the latest silly Batman film and threw a smoke grenade at the audience and opened fire. Shooting 12 people dead, one of them a 6 year -old gurl.

Not asking what a 6 year-old gurl was doing out at that time of night watching movies she should not be watching but this is about murder not bad parenting. It she had good parents she'd be safely in bed as all 6 year-olds should be at midnight. 

It takes special kind guts to shoot at unarmed civilians ......... nerds,dorks and children at that. 

Of course when this happens all the crazy gun-less people go nuts for gun control I guess they would rather get stabbed and beheaded. While Old Knudsen believes in gun control for military grade weapons, other low caliber guns should require a background check and a license but should not be outlawed. 

Mexico has one of the strictest gun control systems in the world and would you call that cuntry safe?

Cars, drink and smoking kill more civilians in the west than guns to so go sort those out .... no wait you like a smoke and a drink and having a car makes getting the shopping in a lot easier. You know what that makes you? ......... a fucking hypocrite.       
If you are a greeny concerned about the world population then it would make sense that you would cheer at such events as this, maybe you support Assad over in Syria too.

 
His mental illness will no doubt be the excuse but that is not any type of excuse. Why didn't he just troll blogs like all the other losers? 

If you feel like shooting someone, please start with yerself.