Tuesday 16 June 2015

Drain The Main Vein

They don't get out much.

Supplies of blood types A, B, AB and O are at a critical low in the UK, so much so there is a nation wide campaign to get people to urgently go somewhere and give blood during national blood week. 

They usually set up in schools and town halls but I've only seen anything about the blood shortage online and who trusts what you read on the Internet? 


Wow how clever and catchy, they leave out the letters, even Downing street is D wning Street, it makes me want to go and give blood immediately .... except what if the person who was to get my blood was a Flegger or a Ukip voter, do I really want to save their lives? 
My blood type isn't the most rare nor is it the most common but to me it's special and I don't like it pouring out of me body or the idea of giving it away to some cunt for free .... just not cool. Fucking scroungers, go earn yer blood like the rest of us.

Maybe we could get an app like on Facebook, 'How worthy are you to get Old Knudsen's blood?' ... start playing. 


What if former Northern Ireland health minister who wants to ban all gheys from donating blood and adopting children Edwin Poots urgently needed a blood transfusion and Old Knudsen was the right type? 

Would Old Knudsen let him die even if he is a Young Creationist, DUP sectarian homophobe? Hopefully you know me well enough to know if I would or even could let another human being die if I was their only chance of life so I don't need to answer. 

YES I'd let the fucker die .... what if it was the other way round? Let me die cos I don't want any of him inside my body not even at a party. 

Old Knudsen's blood is like Khan Noonien Singh's blood, it's like super soldier serum, Charlie Sheen bought my old nose bleed hankies because he can get a really good high and feels as strong as fuck when he snorts me dried blood.   

Of course men who have had oral or anal sex with men within the last 12 months can't donate blood so that's probably Old Knudsen out anyways. What if Bruce Jenner sucked my dick in February and then again in June as Caitlyn, would I have to wait 12 months from Feb or would June set me back too? ... she's bound to get another medal for courage after that.  

This is not discriminatory, the NHS just thinks ghey men are at a higher risk of HIV or Hepatitis B than say heterosexuals and those with multiple sexual partners. 

Even if it's a monogamous ghey couple because unlike straight people you just can't trust them. I'm sure there is a scientist from a Christian university that says ghey blood turns you ghey. But honey I can explain ... it was the blood transfusion I had 4 years ago. 

It's the The Department of Health who makes the policies which trust straight people over gheys not the NHS. 
So what have we learned? Ghey men are less valued by British society because they are dirty fuckers full of disease ... got it. 

So if I go certain parts of Africa and shag a ton of weemen (6 different ones a day for 4 weeks) I only have to wait 6 months upon returning to the UK before I can give blood, does that sound right? 

I'll give blood .... for charity, just make sure the cameras are there. 

Even being in a same sex relationship for years and using condoms isn't enough. I bet that in between tattoos and traveling to foreign cuntries Harry Styles from Yin Direction would be allowed to give blood and he looks like a walking STD for fucks sake. 

Well they can't want blood that badly then ..... G_ fuck y_urself!       

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