Thursday 9 July 2015

Healing Rory's Privates


David Meade is a mentalist from Northern Ireland .... aye this place is full of mentalists but he is one of those yins more akin to a magician than a head case. On the TV show Mentalist it has a guy that notices more than others and uses his brain to out think and out smart people. Cumberbatch's Sherlock would be a mentalist in that sense. Old Knudsen would be a slack mentalist cos most people are too easy to figure out so he doesn't try half the time.


Meade amazed shoppers when he levitated at a shopping centre. You don't see him float up because it was a trick that involved a fake leg bolted onto the wall and hidden by his coat. He does other tricks like guesses what the dice will roll and what numbers come up during roulette etc, things that can be figured out by James Randi and other magicians. 
If you remember that Randi was the one who fucked up Uri Geller's attempts at trickery on the Johnny Carson show. 



Golfer Rory McIlroy hurt his ankle while he was playing soccer with his mates so the Belfast Telegraph came to the rescue and got Meade to set up an experiment to heal him .... the 2015 Open starts soon at St Andrews, Scotland, this is serious. 

All those stories about children with cancer never got a healing hand, nah they can fuck off unless they win a few games of golf. 


So I held my hand there and thought healing power (well I am a very powerful warlock) then I started to feel itchy and my thoughts wandered so if Rory McIlroy gets an infection and starts to piss blood then that would probably be from me and not in a we had some fun way either. 

I remember Geller doing this to re-start broken watches, the watches were too small for us to see on TV but he says it werked so yay! 

Sports people and the famous suffer more than us plebs. 

A sprained ankle can take 6 weeks to heal and Rory has less than two. After a few days of rest you should start putting weight on it again so I reckon he'll be fine for the Open and the Bel Tel can claim a miracle .... even if he did start pissing blood. 

A massive scandal involving the DUP taking money to set up property deals is going on right now but not on the front page of the Telegraph Monday or Tuesday, strange that.  
   

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